This week my granddaughter was supposed to go to her first church camp. When I asked her if she wanted to go, she seemed enthusiastic. Her brothers both did too. That was at the beginning of the summer. On the first day of camp, about an hour after she was supposed to be there, I received word from her father/my son that she didn't want to go and he had forgotten about it. Her mother told her she didn't have to go.
I know that at 13 it is difficult to go someplace new on your own, without a friend. Yet her aunt/my daughter was there, and my granddaughter knew it. She didn't say anything about not wanting to go ahead of time. It wasn't until the day that camp started that we first had any inkling that she didn't want to go.
Now that would be reason enough for me to be peeved. The fee was already paid and I know I won't be getting all of my money back. But that's not the reason I'm having such a hard time letting go of this.
This family does not participate in any religious institution. That's at least partly my fault, as I wasn't participating in any religious institution on any regular basis when my son was growing up. I've never pushed to get them to do so because I firmly believe that it is their choice. But I can't think of a better place to experience God than camp. And that's the only reason I wanted them to go.
But I particularly wanted her to go, because she desperately needs to know that she's ok without having to act like an 18 year old. And she missed that experience.
So I'm trying to let go, and hoping that perhaps I can persuade her for next year.
Letting go. It's tough.
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About Me
- Rev. Suzi Goldt
- Mission (Kansas City suburb), Kansas, United States
- I'm an ordained minister of the Christian Church (Disciples of Christ). I serve as Minister of Worship and Discipleship at Countryside Christian Church in Mission, KS. Most Sundays you'll find me in the pulpit, and I love it. I'm a second career pastor. Being called by God to this position was a shock -- but its been a great ride so far.
2 comments:
13 is hard. And doing what you say you're going to do is even harder. I hope that her parents teach her follow through even if they are not addressing spiritual growth. A lesson I reiterate to my 13 year old all the time (i so wish they could learn the first time through) is that you MUST honor your own word. Minding is important and if I tell you to do something, you better do it. But if YOU say you're going to do something, you are simply diminishing yourself as a person in your own eyes as well as the eyes of others. thankfully god forgives this, too, along with all of our other garbage. But I really hope that your 13 yr old gets this lesson sooner rather than later.
Also, don't you find it hard to share your faith with other adults, like your son. So many christians do so many things that I find embarassing. I often find myself saying things like "yeah, but I'm not THAT kind of christian". I also often hide the fact that my husband is a minister! I wonder if your son has only encountered "those" kind of christians?
Yes, he's encountered "those" kind of Christians. And all too often I find myself in situations where I really don't want people to know that I'm a minister because they automatically assume I'm one of "them" and don't know how to act around me.
And yes -- 13 is very hard. I'm glad I don't have to relive it!
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